Today marks 2 months since my first shot of Testosterone.  It doesn't seem that long but on the other hand it seems like forever to get this far.

What changes have happened due to the T?  I can feel the effects now.  My body temperature is a little warmer, some hot flashes.  Also a little more irritable and impatient...or maybe that's just at work  ;).  My hunger is huge!  I can eat then a little while later, I am painfully hungry again!!   A major change is acne on my head!  Not on my face but on my head!  All over my temples and along the back of my head.  Crazy!  My voice is starting to be deeper on a consistent basis when talking normal.  When I talk with inflictions it goes back up to where it was.  It now sounds like I have a cold when I don't!  I've also noticed that I'm getting a little more facial hair.  It's not very noticeable but I see it!  The 'stache is getting a tiny darker!  In bright enough light, you can see it!!!

Yes, I am very anxious for facial hair.  I have always wanted facial hair!  I have pics at Halloween where the costumes revolved around doing painted facial hair when I was younger.  Heck, even now....the first thing I think of when planning Halloween costumes with Angie is "What can I do that will involve facial hair"? 

I have been watching a bunch of Youtube videos of transitions, I applaud the people that are good with tracking their journey.  It's amazing and I wish I was as dedicated at doing the same.   I try hard to do this because it was requested and  for me to look back at someday.

Last Monday I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon that my Dr. referred me to.  Angie was able to go with me! :)   It was a quick visit.  I went in thinking (assuming) that my insurance would not cover it.  Oh yeah, they said that when I made the appt.! The total for the surgery??  $5886!!   So we talked about doing the top surgery about Feb 2016 (next tax return).  She was fine with doing that far out because when she found out I had only been on T for 2 months and had not talked with a therapist, she was shocked.  She said if I did it any sooner I would need a letter from a Dr. stating that I have Gender Dysphoria. 

Dysphoria......I personally don't like that word.  It sounds like a disease or something.  I understand that it's a condition but I don't think of myself as having a condition.  I was just born with the wrong body!   I digress ...

So Angie and I had been talking that we should still call our insurance company and verify that they don't pay for it.  Well she called today......

THEY COVER IT!!  So after a few calls to my Dr. and the plastic surgeon.....I will be getting a letter from my Dr. and give it to the Surgeon and they are going to try to get a Pre-Authorization!  It seems too good to be true but we will keep our fingers crossed!  Hardest part will be getting 4-6 weeks off of work before the end of the year (which is when we had planned on doing it if we could save enough)  Actually getting it done before April 1st because our deductible is paid up right now and insurance starts new April 1st. 

I need to get it done as soon as possible.  I can not have my mind as a male and have a constant reminder of a female body.  Why....WHY did I have to get the big breast gene from my mother and grandmother???   Binding sucks!  I can't breathe, sit or eat comfortably.  Both Dr.s have nothing nice to say about binders either.  But, with the binder and a couple of shirts.....Not too shabby!

I am more then ready to go through the pain I know is involved to start loving my body.  I am starting to wonder what the sun will feel like on my bare chest.  It's a weird thought but I can't wait!

I love Saturday mornings........time with Angie.....lounging around.

This morning we were talking and playing around.  She all of a sudden noticed some new hairs on my face.  So out came the mirror.  After thorough exploring of my entire face with the flashlight then bringing out the camera....

The picture does not show all the detailed whiskers but they are showing up!  I have always had a longer side of normal stray hairs on my left but now they are more prominent.  There are a few random hairs popping up through out also.

This is super exciting but now a new challenge.  I was in the mind set that until the T took effect in some visual manner that I was not going to stress so badly about binding. 

This is surprisingly a new thought process that has now hit me today......

Here I am on the first day of a new year!   Any new year resolutions?  No, I don't like them because I feel it's an easy way to be disappointed at the end of the year.  I am looking forward to seeing the effects of the T this year and I do wish for a healthy transition through it all.

I just finished the overnight shifts and got through the holidays.  Things can calm down now.....please calm down now! 

For Xmas Angie gave me a bunch of shirts...which I really wanted..and a couple of razors....which I really needed.  I love her and her support so much!!

Last night was New Years Eve and I got all dressed up in my new digs.  I felt great about myself!  My other goal was to look good for my wife! 

New effects of the Testosterone??  Not really.  The only noticeable thing is my libido.   Let me say that things are increasing.  I'll leave it at that. ;)  

I had my 30day Drs. appt on Dec 18th.   She just wanted to know how I was feeling....depressed, suicidal?  Nope, pretty happy overall.   I have my next appt in March which at that point they will probably do testing on my levels.  She said that it usually takes 6 months to notice any changes in levels or anything.

On Jan 12th I have a consultation with a surgeon for my chest.  I'm going to find out what is involved, more of a idea on cost and to see if I need to change my insurance at all to see if that can help out even a little bit.  

This is going to be the hardest part for me.  Wearing the binder is so uncomfortable.  The new shirts really help for the most part but the binder makes me more aware of my chest, I feel bigger.   Because the T hasn't had much affect visually, I haven't been wearing the binder regularly.   What happens when that changes though?  And I have to wait a full year to get surgery?   This is my only true depressing moment.  But I just have to keep on, wear bigger clothes and deal with the binder. 

I am again so thankful for the support I continue to get from friends and family.  I know some people don't understand and some people need time to process.  But one example was my brother in law telling me last night that he respects me more now, realizes that this took a lot of courage for me and that he is there for me in any capacity that he can be!   Another was my sister calling me "Bro" in a comment on F'book.  One more is my Dad being the same Dad from all my life.  Truly loves me and truly cares about my life!   Yes, I thought things might get a little awkward when I came out as Trans but they are not! 

Feeling Grateful!